Prayer Quilt

January 18th, 2007
Word got out about our situation in my hometown and a special lady, Mancy Johnson, and her friends, & church decided to make me a prayer quilt for my family. She gave it to me a few days ago and this is one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for me. Some of you may be asking "what is a prayer quilt?"...well if you look closely you can see the dark grey embroidery thread tied in knots. This quilt was passed around to different ladies around town, they sewed on it, and each lady said a prayer for me. After their prayer they tied a knot in the embroidery thread. Also one lady took it to her church and her church laid their hands upon it and each person tied a knot in it also. She left some spots untied for friends and family to tie too. The symbolism of the blanket is that everytime I look at it its suppose to remind me of the pl that prayed for me and my family during this time. She said that every time I use it that I am "wrapped in prayer." Anyways I wanted to share this with yall because many of you were there for me. I met Mancy through the Clerks office and she has been and election worker for years. I thank Mary White for surrounding me with such great people. Also to dear Mancy for thinking of us during this time. Many thinks to all of the local churches that put us on your prayer lists as well. We felt every single one of your prayers.

First Date all over again

October 17th, 2006
SINCE I HAVE BEEN CANCER FREE! Sometimes it seems as though it all happened within a blink of an eye! I cant believe that my pregnancy is already 1/2 way over with. Before I know it I will be holding another baby girl!

September 30th, 2006
First date after surgery. We ended up going to On the Border. We were going to eat some ice cream but I started feeling bad. When I stand or walk for too long my stomach and incision start to swell and it causes discomfort. So we came home and watched The Lakehouse which is kinda different but it wasn't too bad.

Good Margins

September 26th, 2006

They think that they got good margins when they took my tumor out!!! Basically they dissected the tumor and the healthy tissue around it that they removed. They checked for microscopic pieces and things like that. I am so happy right now. That just means there's a slimmer chance of it coming back in the future!!! She wasn't sure when she wants to do another ultrasound. She said she may wait until after the baby is born. I am assuming they can see the area better without a huge baby in the way haha!! They will keep my abdomen monitored and I will go to frequent (every 3-6 months) check-ups for the next 5 years and after that they will gradually decrease the amount of time between check ups.

Post Surgery Frustration

September 25th, 2006
I am starting to feel so cooped up in my house. I cant drive for another 2 weeks, my house is filthy, Bryan wants dinner and I cant lift a pot/pan and I cant bend over to reach my casserole dishes, I cant get out anywhere because I am so sick, and Bryan is gone 24/7! Em was here this weekend and she left again because I can still barely take care of myself. I get so lonely when shes not here but when she was here this weekend I was too sick to play alot with her. She accidentally rammed my incision and I lost my breath and had a shocked look on my face. Poor thing cried and cried because it made her feel bad. I just feel like I am sitting here all freaking day waisting away like a log. Bryan hasnt been home much but when hes home I think I get on his nerves because I cant do anything! This is nothing compared to a c-section. I had a c-section with Emory and I went into surgery thinking that this is what it was going to be like...boy was I wrong. I went to my cancer chat site and a few have had abdonminal surgery and they all say that its pretty bad. Another lady said she had a c-section and she too learned you cant compare them. GRRRR...I am just irritable and needed to vent before I go nuts over here.

Surgery is done! I am cancer Free!

Mt Dr Whom gets much of the credit along with God!


September 24th, 2006
Well I had my surgery on the 18th (Monday). I had to go in to the ER on Tues night because I was vomiting and couldn't keep anything down. Turns out that my body could not handle my pain meds, I was dehydrated, and developed a bacterial infection due to the dehydration. I was released Friday evening. As far as the surgery goes...OUCH! That was prob one of the most painful things I have ever experienced. It was worse then childbirth! Yes WORSE! I got off of my pain meds the day after surgery because I thought that may have been what was keeping me sick and I wanted as little as possible to go to the baby...but had to take a few here & there. My tumor basically doubled (rough estimate) in size within 2 weeks therefore my surgery was more extensive. My prosthetic is 4X4 inches. Post surgery when my surgeon came in I thought she meant 4X4 cm but she kinda laughed at me when I asked! I guess I was so drugged up I could not comprehend what she even said ha! My incision is about 8-9 inches long so its still pretty sore...especially without pain meds. If I weren't so sick feeling things would be tons better.
My OB said that when we have this baby via c-section he will do a little tummy tuck and try to get rid of most of the scarring from the sarcoma surgery. The baby tends to be fine. We will not know any effects from my surgery until after its born unless something is obvious on ultrasound when I am further along. We will have another ultrasound on wed so we may find out what it is then.
They are going to cut my tumor open and see if she got the surrounding area good enough. If not then it will come back and I will have to go through yet another surgery. Anyways that's my update for now. PLEASE PRAY that my recovery goes even better. I am still nauseated and have migraines. Plus my incision is still sore. Before surgery I lost a total of 2 pounds and after surgery its a total of 3. I am 17 weeks and still losing weight so hopefully once I get my strength and appetite back I will put on some pounds for this baby! Thank you everyone who has prayed and shown such great support. I just pray that this is the last of it and it will never come back. As of now I can officially say I am cancer free until we get the results back from MD Anderson about the tumor and its surroundings.

Official Oncologist details

September 12th, 2006
We got some good and bad news. The good news is that its about an inch smaller then they thought it was originally (they did an ultrasound on it). The bad news is that its sitting right on the muscle and they wont be able to tell if its attached to it or in it until the surgery. I was in shock when she told me that she was going to have to take out alot more muscle then expected but I felt so blessed that they are doing the best they can and making the right choices to make sure this thing has a minimum chance of coming back. I am still getting the mesh prosthetic. It will be put on my muscle...I don’t know if they will stitch it or use staples. Im not sure how that works. I am assuming stitches. My surgery is on mon, I should only stay 1 night. The OB in Houston said that basically its alot like a c-section. I cant do this and that...for those that have had c-sections you know what I mean. She did say that I will be exhausted because I am pregnant. She said that it should be more exhausting then when I had my c-section with a new baby. I am thinking it cant be any worse because I breastfed Emory and had little to no help at all.

As far as the baby there’s a 3% chance that I will miscarry or go into preterm labor. The anesthesia will cross the placenta therefore it could lead to low birth weight. Genetically if this baby takes after Emory a low birth weight for me would be 6-7 lbs. Emory was induced early and still weighed 8lb 11oz. Dr Gayle did my ultrasound yest to do before and after pics of the baby because of my surgery. I will have another one the wed after my surgery to make sure the baby is fine. The baby will have its heartbeat checked during my surgery too. This was the first visit that I have NOT bawled my eyes out. I have actually felt great and on the 18th I can proudly say that I WILL OFFICIALLY BE CANCER FREE!

The Game plan

September 1st, 2006
I just got a call from MD Anderson from my ONCO/GY and I now have 1 appt on Wednesday and 4 appts on Thursday. I am sure it will all go well and we are going to get alot of the answers to the Q's we have been having since we found out about the tumor. Again thank you so much to everyone that has been so helpful, provided alot of support for us, and of course keeping us in your prayers.

Heres a brief about my appts:

1. OBGYN in Houston- we will get statistics on the baby miscarriage/preterm labor etc. Also I should get info on how long I should be on bed rest (Dr said it could be 6-8 weeks grrrr).

2. Ultrasound on tumor-this will determine the actual size to prepare the surgeon. Since the tumor is on my abdomen I may ask them to take a peek at the baby....if qualified maybe they can tell me what I’m having hehe!

3. Oncologist/gynecologist-they specialize in pregnant women with cancer and she did not give me the details what this was going to be all about. I am assuming its more of a "support" session unless she checks on the baby etc.

4. Oncologist-she will tell me all about my surgery etc.

5.Anesthesiologist- this is just to review my case, determine how to put me under (since I'm pregnant) and he should also give me statistics on pregnant women and how the anesthesia effects me and the baby.

* Forgot to add that I have another appt next Monday with Dr Gayle but that one should be a breeze!