Am I dying???

August 3rd, 2006 (My Wedding Anniversary of all things)
To start today is the day I was suppose to get the big news and I never received a phone call. 4:00 o'clock rolled around so I called a few times and a nurse finally pulled my chart. I could hear in her voice it was not good. She told me that my Dr was in surgery and he would call me as soon as he was out and ended the conversation is such a sympathetic tone "If you need anything please let us know"...
So I tell Bryan and I am all shaken up because I am a women...and we understand that womenly tone ha! Bryan just thought I was overacting but sure enough...I was not...

Here is my journal entry:
Our family needs your prayers right now. I just found out that I have a rare tumor. He wants to have surgery right when I hit my second trimester. He said that its a less common fatty tumor, minimal deviation melanoma, and it can grow and expand quickly. They want it out asap because it can invade surrounding structures. He said that it is unlikely to spread like a bad cancer. Luckily I will hit my second trimester in a few weeks. Since its so rare they sent it to a pathology lab in Houston at The UT M.D. Anderson Cancer Center and his office will call me tomorrow or Monday and schedule a MRI to see if its worked its way to my muscles or other organs in my abdominal cavity. He called it spindle cell neoplasm. I have to do a lot of reading to do on this. Also he said that it shouldn't effect the baby. If it has reached my muscles or other organs then it will call for an extensive surgery and I will have to go to a cancer clinic in Houston to get it checked out and have a surgeon there perform the surgery. Chemo & radiation are possibilities at this point and even possibly losing our baby =( The risk is low for it coming back but I will have to go in every 3 months for a while.

After I got off of the phone and read the results Bryan told me I was dying....Am I dying??? No, I am not!